I'm so tired. Past few days at work, kept dozing off! I sneaked inside the storeroom and dozed off there. =p Cannot blame, i'm just too tired. I've slept for less than 5 hours and rushed for work nah. Often, my routine goes like this :
->Slept for 5hours today
->Went for work after i wake
->Had my breakfast on the way to work in bus.
->Took my lunch+dinner break(30mins)
->Carried on working until i went back home.
->Reached home, play maple/audi.
->Went to bed when i feel tired.
->Always got woken up by laogong's game sound(every hour interval thr my sleep)
->Got once got woken up cos he's chatting on the phone with his friend(Female)
->Wake up, feeling very tired.
->Went for work.
->Had breakfast on my way to work.
->...............................
It went on for a few days. Similar routine daily.
When i met heni last night, she said i slimmed down a lil. Went back home to eat supper, brother asked me why i slimmed down. Of cos will slim nar. Even thou i ate alot every day, i still slimmed down. Maybe cos of stress bah. I guess so. I hope my fig will continue to grow smaller. With a slim body, i wont be so troubled when i wear my clothes. I don't have to worry about how i look in those clothes too^^ Oh yes, i forgot to mention this, my boobs seemed to have grown SMALLER compared to last time! I was so shocked when i wore my tube dress. It wasn't as full as last time! When i saw that, i remembered that my colleague mentioned that when u eat very lil to slim down, Ur boobs will become GRAPE from ORANGE[exaggerated version]. My poor boobs =( So sad. They grew smaller. *CRIES* Oh well, it's only my boobs, so forget it!
Life's been tough for me these past 2 weeks. Recently, have been feeling depressed. Cried my hearts out on one of the night. I cried for like an hour. It happened on the 22th. Which was 5 days ago. He went out even thou he saw me crying. I asked him to stay home with me, i don't wish to be alone. Yet, he didnt agree to it, he still went out. Before he went out, i request for a breakup. Yet his reply was "U rest first." and he went out. So i texted him instead, saying i'm serious bout the breakup. Only replied to one of his message. The following are our text&replies.
"I'm serious about the breakup."
"I go find friend talk only then come back liao..B4 7 sure reach home.."
"It's not about u going out or not. It's how u treat me. Ur friend call u, u went out immediately. I ask u go out, u always say see first then end up never go out with me. I feel that i'm not important to u. Ur buddies are of a higher importance than me to u. If u're someone who treats friends better than gf, then i rather be ur friend than ur girlfriend. I feel there's nothing special as ur gf. I would rather be ur friend n be of a higher importance."
"I meet jy n one more friend call lionel i dunno u know him a not.. Sry for leaving u alone at home.. I really love u, u can wait me i b4 7 sure reach home believe me 1 more time.."
"U dun believe u can ask winna i saw her n jms.."
"I also not go meet girl.. Dun worry k i wont do that.."
I only sent him 2 msg in total that night. Cos i was all along crying, my eyes cant see clearly at all. Didnt have the mood to reply him too. I called winna jie while i'm crying to ask her to come accompany me. She heard me crying and she said she's coming over. So she finished up her things over at 768 and came over to accompany me. I was so touched. That night, i drank abit. A lil of his XO+green tea [1/4 XO,1/4green tea]. I drank 1/4 of the whole mixture in one big mouth. I felt giddy after that. I slept not long after winna jie came. He came back at 630am if i never see wrongly. He bought a set of Mcd breakfast for me. SME meal. He woke me up and told me to eat. After which, he started playing his dota and winna jie went off to the living room when he came back. I started eating the hashbrown followed by the burg. I was all along in the living room with winna jie while eating, she was watching the tv then. I was so happy that he remembered that i'm hungry. But he forgot that i don't take cheese. So i had to go over the trouble of removing the cheese from the burg before consuming.
Yesterday, the whole day, i've been experiencing chest pain. At regular intervals of 15mins from i wake till i slept. Estimated chest pains, counting the pains = over 500 times. Its everytime i breath out, it hit me once. Whole day feeling so sick. I went to his house taking the last train cos i suddenly got the urge to play maple&audi. Laughs. Slept at 4am last night and woke at 130am today. LATE FOR WORK! I supposed to reach work place at 1230pm. I reached at 1pm instead. After i opened shop, i went to buy KFC to eat. I took 2hours to finish eating my toasted twisted meal. Oh yes, CB KFC! increase the price of the mayo! It used to be 50cents. Now its double the price. $1. Damm mayo.
Now watching next door guy dancing. He said they've got a performance coming up. Laughs. SO FUNNY! So =='' Laughs laughs~~ Shall stop here. Goodbye!
He cooked last night, late night~ So happy^^ Smiles filled me up. I never once stopped smiling while he's cooking. He made porridge. We watched a movie together, followed by my MissNoGood. He saw that i kept laughing and he started to watch too. Too bored to update the details. Shall post the picture i took of our porridge next time.
Today's the 18th. It happened on the 16th night. He got into A&E @ SGH. I got to know that he went in when i'm closing the shop at Fareast Level 3. I was trying to lock the damm door then. When i first heard about the news, my mind went blank. All i wanted to do then was to get to the hospital as fast as i could, but the door just wont lock. Luckily the girl next door was there to help me. I was so lucky, thank God. I ran to level 1 to return the keys and rushed off for SGH. I reached in 20mins. It was through train okay. It's really fast. Imagine just how fast i ran =x
When i reached SGH, i don't know how to get to A&E, so i asked around. When i finally reached A&E, i don't know how to get to the reception. Damm. So i called jie again to ask her and she lead me there through the phone. I was panicking when i reached the reception okay. Cos i can't find him at A&E, the reception's computer was down too! I looked around and i had a glance of a patient with similar shoes which he usually wears. I rushed up to take a closer look. It was him, lying there covered with a pool of blood. I was stunned. I stood there and my brain paused. I couldnt think at all. Tears flow. I can't check for him condition throught the receptionist, i can't follow him into the operation room either. All i could do is to wait, nothing else. Reject ahfong and james arrived around 11pm. We waited and waited. After a few hours, i went to the recept and asked the nurse again. After she've checked, she confirmed that he's having his hand stitched, so we'll be able to see him soon. I was in a panick and i kept asking the nurse questions. The nurse kept calming me =='' i was so malu then. hahas.
An hour later, the nurse told us he's being bought into the observation ward and we're able to see him. When i first saw him, i kept quiet. I really don't know what to say. It's just too shocking. He took the bag that contains his top and showed us, it's like a bag of blood. I forced my tears from falling, i don't wish to let him see me in tears. We were sent out of the ward by the nurse cos the patients over there needs to rest. I took his cap and that bag out. Awhile later, auntie arrived and went in to see him. Doctor recommended that he stays in the hospital for further observation cos his head is injured, it's best to stay in the hosp. But he's just so stubborn! Rather take the risk than stay in the hosp.
I was so angry then. Why doesnt he want to stay in the hosp??!! Why must he be so stubborn!! He kept rejecting the offer to stay in the hosp even after what the doc says. His mum also gave in to him. Haiz. Let it be. Since it's his wish. The doc recommended a last scan before discharging him to ensure that his brain is alright. I followed him until he went in the x-ray room and waited outside for him. While he's inside doing the scan, i was alone outside the room waiting for him, i snapped and cried. I couldn't control my tears this time round. He came out not long after, i wiped off my tears very quickly and saw him being pushed into another ward, waiting to be discharged. We all waited outside for like an hour before we got to see him walking out, discharged finally! I was so glad to be able to see him walking again. I'm terrified when i saw how much blood he shed while being operated to get his head and hands stitched. Now, i see him walking and kicking alive, with pains thou. But at least, he's kicking lively. Everythings fine and back to normal. We squeezed his mum's van and went back home.
Its past 3am when we reached home, i see that he took his medications before i went to bath. When i came out from my bath, he's sitting outside on the sofa in the living room. I sat there with him, see how weak he looked, my heart broke. He kept asking me to go to sleep. I kept saying i wanted to accompany him. Yet he still shoved me back into the room. I was so depressed that i went back to the room and cried. Why must he push me away? I really needed him so much then. I just wanted to be by his side. I know he's thinking about some things too, but i really just wanted to be by his side. Oh well, nevermind. I just went to bed, cry until i fell asleep.
When i woke up in the morning, i saw him sleeping so i went back home to get my things. I left him a note on the table, asking him to msg me or call me when he wakes. He msged me at around 3pm while i was on the bus on my way back to his house. I called him when i was near his house to ask what he wanna have for lunch. He said he doesnt want to eat, he asked me to eat if i want, he just doesnt want to eat. I was like ...WTF you want lah.. ask u eat lunch, then take medication, u everything also don't want. I hanged the phone and went up his house. It was drizzling then, it explains all the feelings inside me.
When i reached his house, i put my things down and gave him his medications with a cup of water. I sat there quietly, looking at him, hoping that he'll take his medications. He didnt. I sat there for 15mins, can't stand his stubbornesss and went back into the room and ignored him for the day. If u don't want me to stand by you and look after you, i'll let it be. I'll ignore you since u like to be alone so much. Whatever~ I was so tired and i still had to look after you. I even took the day off from my boss to look after you cos i know, ur parents aint at home, nobody's at home to looke after you. I specially took the day off and that's what u gave me in return. Being stubborn, making me worry and stuffs! I hate such things. I left him alone in the living room hoping he'll reflect.
I went to bed after that, crying again. How could he treat me like this! Urgh, take a knife and stab me thank you. Remove me from such pains~ While i was crying, i heard him putting the cup down, the noise. So i tot he had his medications. But why didnt i heard the noise of the medicines's package. In doubt, i went out to ask and he really DID NOT take his medications yet. I saw that his cup is a quarter filled. I took the cup and poured more water for him, placed the cup back onto the table and left for the room. Same thing, i went back onto the bed and cried again. Not long later, i heard the medi's package sound and now, i can confirmed that he's taking his medication ^^ i was so happy that i dashed out to see. He really am holding onto the medicines and i smiled. I sat beside him and helped him with the medicines. He went to cook noodles after he had his medications. Of cos i'm happy~ he's finally willing to take his medications and eat something.
I slept not long after that, am too tired. At around 9+, he came beside me, waking me softly and asked me what i wanna eat for dinner. I wasn't in a state to reply or think, so i ''huh'' his every single question =x In the end, i ''orh'' him. He walked out of the room after putting me back to sleep and told his mum to pack me food. I woke up not long after and went out to watch tv with him. While we're watching tv, he flipped the book which i left a message for him in the morning. He went over and torn the page out, crashed it and threw it away. At that time, i was wondering what he wrote on it that he wanted to throw it away. I even wanted to go downstairs to find that piece of paper to have a look at whats on it. He said he wanted to eat something, but don't know what to eat. So i offered to go down buy since i wanna drink HL choco milk too. He told me what he wanted and i went out. I totally forgot to go get that piece of crashed paper! So i think, nevermind, let it be. It's better not to know anyway.
I've downloaded this taiwan drama series <<不良笑花>> ''Miss No Good'' by Wilber Pan and Raine Yang. We started watching the first episode together. When we're watching, i kept saying ''WOW, look at wilber, handsome right!'' ''Look look! See, SO handsome hor?'' I said similar stuffs for like five to six times. After the 6th time, he stood up and walked out of the room to go back to the living room to watch the damm boring tv - ch 8. Laughs, i know, he's angry and jealous that I said how gorgeous and handsome those actors are. I kept honging him luh~ But he wasnt pleased, so i mai care liao, i go back in to watch my MissNoGood^^ Can't be bothered with such a petty guy =p After which i slept, woke up in the morning.
Seeing that he's still sleeping, i went back to sleep too. When we're both awake, i was so hungry~ His mum packed him rice ler, which he finished up. He didnt even ask me if i'm hungry or not. Alright, its okay. I called my mum and she's at home. So i changed and took my bag to go home. I accompanied him to finish his cigg before i left. Before i left, i asked him "Want me to come back later ma?" "Dunnid bah, u come when u off. Dont travel here and there, too tiring ler.'' "Orh." "When's ur off day?" "Tml after work jiu off ler." "Okay, then u come tml after work." "Orh." "Must come hor." I smiled at that last sentence he said. =x
Reached home, onlined msn, watch tv, eat and stuffs. Around 10+ close to 11pm. Happy msged me, asking me wanna hack or not. Thinked and thinked. OKAY! Hack bah! I shall call him and ask him if i'm able to go over or not. He said okay. I changed and rushed to take the last train (: When i reached the 7-11 near his house, i msged him and ask him if he wanna get anything from 7-11 or not. He said "I'm outside. Wait for me at home." When i saw that msg, i stood at where i was and stared at my phone. People who walked past me, tot i was crazy =='' Seriously, u're injured and u went out at this time to do what! I was so angry that i went in the 7-11, bought my ice-cream and stomped up his house. Super duper angry okay! So i hacked with happy until 3am i think or was it 4am? i forgot. Then i started waiting for him to come back home. When i texted him after i stopped hacking,he said he's coming back soon. So i waited outside in the living room on the sofa for him. I wait until i fell asleep~ ==" When he came back, he woke me up and asked me to go sleep in the room. It was 530am then. So late then come back lor! I asked him why he went out and what he did outside. He said play dota with friends and do some stuffs. Okay lor, nvm, too tired to make noise and i went back to sleep.
Okay, I'm blogging after like, days? Laughs. Seriously, these few days, am really busy working. From Sunday, I've been working till yesterday which is the Friday. Yes! For 6 whole days! And this afternoon around 1pm, my boss texted me, asking if i'm available to work extra for TODAY. If i really went for work which is from 3pm till 10pm. Then, i'll be working 9 days straight! NINE DAYS OKAY! Damm. Today really wanna work der, but i hardly pei laogong mah, so rejected boss's offer T.T I feel lousy after rejecting his offer to work today. If i can work today, i think when i get my pay on 5th Dec, I'll probably get 800SGD which is like, so much~ DUH! But i'm sorry, i'm afraid i cant today. I really got to accompany my laogong. He's of a high importance to me other than money.
When i first received boss's msg, i asked laogong should i go work or not. His reply was "Kan ni lor" Translate = "See you lor" Which is a up to me answer. I knew he would be unhappy if i were to go work. We woke at 3pm today. He climbed up on the bed and looked for me. I was really sleepy then, so i can't be bothered and carry on sleeping. But he was hugging me while i'm asleep, i couldnt really sleep well, so i woked in the end. The first thing i told him after we woke was, let's go grab our lunch. I really wanted to eat TOGETHER with him so much. We hardly meet since i started working. So yea, understand me please. I'm not asking for food the moment i wake like a pig, i'm not a hungry ghost alright! I just wanted to have my lunch with him! But i was so displeased with his reply. ''See how lor" That was his answer to me. Alright alright, fine fine. He started playing his audi after we woke. I was like, whatever~ I went out to the living room and helped him with his things. Half way through his things, i read my CLEO, drink water, walk around the house, go into the room and watch him play. My butt just wont stick to the chair obediently. Laughs. Around 4:30pm, he asked me what i wanna eat, he's going down to pack food. I told him what i wanna eat, and he went off to buy. I was really happy. It was so long since he last asked me what i wanna eat. It's really long (: But abit disappointed. What i wanted at first was to have lunch with him OUTSIDE, not at home. He came back and passed me my food. We ate seperately, i'm in the living room and he had his lunch in his room.
While i was eating, i suddenly got the urge to go toilet and bake something >< so i packed my food back , took the towel and said this " i got bath first, my food i haven't finish, later then eat" Seriously, i talked while i walk to the toilet from his room. My tummy couldnt hold on any further. I really needed the toiletbowl so much. Why did i do so many moves? Why not just rush to the toilet and not say anything? Why came up with the excuse of bathing? Cos i don't like others to know that i'm da bian-ing. It's embarassing~
After i came out from the business i had in the toilet plus showering, i went on to do his things. That was around 530pm. At around 6pm, he came out from his room and started helping me to complete his thing. Last night before going out, we were doing that thing of his, together (: I was really happy at that point of time. We chatted so much. Smiles, laughters and happiness were all on my face. His face had those too. But there were doubts too, i just didnt pour them out. I don't wish to have any arguements not long after we got back together. Yupp.
I asked him these "What if got people hong me?" "What if i talk on phone with other guys?" "What if i message with other guys?" "Got people say my voice cute leh." "Got people wanna date me." "At work got people take number from me lor." There're many many WHAT-IF questions. His replies were mainly "Don't let me find them, they sure end up in hospital." He overheard my conversation with my audi couple before he went out, so he questioned me also lah. He asked who my couple whack last night. I said "A guy lor." and guess what he said, he said this "ask him come whack me lah, I'll make sure he become a xiao di di" Okay, whatever, obviously he's not shuang that i talked to my couple on phone. Laughs~ I told him not to touch any of these guys i've talked or texted or whatever. I don't wish to see them on the hospital bed.
He showed me four photos of a new guy which he wanna whack last night. This guy looks GREAT! Definitely someone i would wanna meet. He looks abit like RAIN BI~! I was like stunned when i first saw the photos. Really KAWAII leh! So i told my boyfriend "You can whack anywhere of this guy, ONLY his face CANNOT touch!" I even said, "Bring me go when u all going down to whack him leh, i want see this guy real life." Obviously he said, NO to every single please-bring-me-go questions i gave him. Just now, we talked about this guy again. Of cos, i asked him to bring me along AGAIN. His answers were a NO-NO. Hurhur, whatever, this guy's face is pictured in my brain, i can go down his area and take a look myself (: Laogong wanna find out this guy's address, which is kindda hard to find cos low-profile maintained by this guy. Only way is to find out the address from the guy himself. So i offered, "Why not i go close to him and find out his address?" His immediate reply was "Then he wont end up in the hospital ler." I was so happy when he said that, at least this guy will be safe mah! I was self-happying inside. But this washed away my inner laughter "he'll end up in the coffin instead." I was like ....what the hell..... luh~ Laughs.
Laogong went out in a rush just now, ah fong tio taiji. Now i'm waiting in vain at home for his return T.T Sadded. Since 11+ he went out, till now, he's still not back. I'm worried. I wanna call him der, but i'm afraid that i'll disturb him. So i dropped the idea of calling him. His mum also asked me for his news, but i've got nothing to report to her. ): How i wish he could just tell me how's the situation over at that side. Reject was being called down too. I hope things would be find for these guys. *Prays*
19:40"Eaten your dinner? I miss you a lot lor. How do u think about our relationship so far?"
20:02"Ya.. Eaten my dinner.."
20:17"Is there something wrong with us? ==? Did i make u angry in anyway?"
21:20"My thing euu do ler ma?"
21:28"Nope, I no time go up do. I see later how. The sewing, very easy de. A few hrs done. Wed i off, i on wed pass u."
21:30"I tot euu that day come up my hse wan pass mi der.. My training started on thur.."
21:38"U already training or starting ur training on thur?"
21:50"Already started.."
22:07"Sorries. I really too tired aft work to do it last week. Ten we still cold war, i no mood do.I tml n tue got work. I wed night pass u.Tue night i going over do after work."
22:20"kk.."
Ask him about us, he came with a reply of his things. Really nothing to say. Don't know what to do either. Sighs.
Stayed over at dear's house last night. Actually didnt have the intention of staying over, as i couldn't catch the last bus back home, i stayed. We didnt even chat since i stepped into his house, till this afternoon i left his house. Came in without a word, left without a word too. Not even a hello, not even a bye. He did talked to me last night. Go inside the room and sleep. These six words. That's all. He came out of the room and asked me to go into the room and sleep. Around 2am i think. Was semi-coma when i heard those words. Twice i think, first time is to wake me up and ask me to go into his room and sleep. I sat up, was too tired and blur to even walk, i stared into the blank and look around, trying to figure out where i am. That's funny when i think back. Laughs. After a shortwhile, he saw that i didnt go in, he came out and asked me to go in again, then and only then, i stood up and understand what i should do. That is to walk into his room, climb onto his bed, and sleep. He make sure that i stood up, then he came over to off the fan in the living room and started walking back to his room. So i blur blur, follow him back to his room, walked behind him. Upon reaching the room, he helped me to switch on the fan in his room and he sat down back to face is comp. So eventually,i slept. While sleeping, B texted me. I press away the message and continue to sleep. Sorry but i was too tired and unconcious to look at any words.
I woke up at around 11am. I heard him talking quite loudly on the phone, then i woke up. He kept talking to the other party about soccer and bettings. It was so noisy that i woke up. Cant sleep well. Imma light sleeper, so can't blame me for waking up at a pin-drop sound. Laughs. Woke up, removed my make up, oops, i didnt remove my makeup last night cos i dozed off. Brush my teeth, pack my stuffs, take my bag, and left without a word. He didnt bother keeping me back either. So let it be. I open the door myself, i close the door myself too. I really don't know, are we working? Or we've stopped. He couldnt give me any answer, i don't wish to bother him with any questions. Its just in case that he says i'm nagging him, which even his mum also don't dare. So i rather not take up the job on questioning. Let him come forward and clarify things. I'll leave it as it is for now. Until then, i wont make any move, i wont msg him or call him unless necessary. People ask me, you and him still together? I really don't know what to answer. My replies are always "yes, still together >> sort of still together >> think so stilll together >> i don't know lah" liddat. My answers, always these 4, one after another i tell them. so at the end of the day, they also dunno we still together or not. Laughs. Me myself don't know either, how would they know? My mum asked too. i gave her the same answers, and her expressions were. shakehead and plus a [haiz] . speechless i guess.
It'll be a long day tml also. At far east level 3, a boring no-sales ulu small lil shop. hate that place alot. boring. wonder what imma gonna do to pass time tomorrow =( Watched CyborgGirl. Now watching I'mACyborgButThat'sOkay . Later gonna watch 恋空. Goodbye, Going back to my movie~
urgh, gona be late for work! ><><>< byebye!!!!!!!!!
Lastly, when will he msg me today with the ''^^'' On wednesday night, i msged him this >> Are you gonna ignore me for good? << His reply was "^^". The next day which is yesterday, thursday, he msged me at around 6pm "^^". What he trying to say lor. U know, xiao li chang dao, A knife hidden behind a smile. laughs. bye! Gonna rush!
Woke at 7.45 this morning. Guess what time i slept last night? Hehe, i slept at 2am. So total hours of sleep i've gotten equals to almost 6hours. This 6hours is just half of my usual sleeping time! I'm deprived of sleep alright! What was i doing between 12am till 2am? Hacking the UBP in audition. Laughs. mere 2hours, i've made 3millions dens. It goes like this >> 3,000,000 << . Chio right?! =p Luckily got 2 people pei wo UBP, both hackers too! We're not pro in hacking but since there're 3 people hacking together, we made it through successfully, without any failures. Was so happy after looking at my dens. It was like waterfall!
Got to save up 150million dens for my FAM in audition T.T Hard time sia. Wonder when can i finish saving up. guess i would need a few resets i think. Gahs >.<'' Having another session of hacking later on, after i've waked up from my nap. Should be around 5am as agreed, but when i went in audition just now, there's a network maintenance until 6am. So i guess we'll have to do it at 6am instead.
Gotta rush for work tomorrow. I was scheduled from 4pm till 10pm, but boss went to extend my schedule. He asked me to reach at 1pm and i'll have to work all the way until 11pm! Why? Metro sales lor! 20% storewide, its the christmas sales lah. No choice, slogger myself till 11pm bah. Work hard girl ! You've nothing else except work left. Everyone left you, only work didnt. So glad that there's work with me. If not right now, i'll probably be crying on my bed with my blanket over my whole body and having a hard time breathing. I'm lucky.
Alot of things happened for the past few days. I'll do a rewind (: O5.11.O8, Wed - Accompanied dear to find uncle to help him solve his current mystery, that "thing" and his half-paralysed face since lunar 7th month. He got some amulet and was told to follow some instructions. He can finally sleep in his room , get to use his fan and he's able to off the lights to sleep. =x O5.11.O8, wed - Quarrelled with him. I was merely being concern about the instructions that was given to him. So i msged him, asking him, has he bath? He was supposed to burn the amulet and put it in the bathing water and bath. His reply was "Ya, nw eating.." He was also supposed to do another thing, which is to burn the yellow amulet, put in water, and drink it up. So i msged him " You got burn the yellow amulet and drink ma?" Bloody hell, his reply "I know wad to do lah.. Even my mum also dun dare nag me" WTH. I was just afraid that you'll forget to do anything ma. All these things are important to the recovery of your bloody half paralyzed face okay! You think i eat full full then nothing do then go waste my every 5 cents to msg you? You think again. If i'm nagging you, i wont msg u only at 3pm+ I would have done that at 1pm instead! Its so DUH, YOU KNOW HOW ANGRY I AM lah. Of cos, i was so angry that i typed "I'm just asking right? U dun have to attitude me. Since u dun like me to ask den sua. From now on dun talk to me lor." After which, he didnt reply, i also didnt bother to text him anything. O5.11.O8, wed - Until at night, he texted me" Euu coming later or" . After reading his msg, i wanted to reply " U want me come or not?" But think again, if i msg him that, his reply confirm will be ''Up to you" So sua, i replied this instead >> What. Why still talk to me.<< >>>Then its ok..<< Chio girl! Way to go! Show him that u've got temper too! Show him that u're a human, not a pet who obeys the master! Make him appreciate you! Make him treasure you! O4.11.O8, Tue - Got back to his house after work. Ate half plate of the rojak his mum gave me. He came out from a shower not long later. Then he was telling me about the new hack and he learned the glitch from Ying. When did he learned it? A few days ago, but he denied to me last time. Meaning? he lied lor. So i asked him to teach me the glitch. He showed me and guided me. After we're done, he said this. Shouldn't have taught you, cos ying said so. She say you will leak out for sure. I was told not to teach u der, and next time, cannot tell u alot of things ler. I got my reason der.......... So i kept asking why why why why & why. He finally said, cos u will leak out. His alot of things applies even to his personal life, in simple, any thing. Yes, >>> Any Thing <<<>auntie, i go home first ler. Byebye ^^< Her face was full of question mark cos she was wondering what happened to me and eugene as she heard eugene raised his voice.
Thats all i've got to update. Super tired. Actually that's not all. Just too tired to type further. Had enough of the think-back stufffs. Time to hop on to bed, got to wake at 6am later on. Or maybe not. depends on the both of them. Alright. Goodnight. Bye (:
I know i shouldnt be typing these words. I'm a super civilised person. But i'm sorry this time round i really can't help it. Just let me vent my anger until i'm pleased. Thanks and just bear with it for the time being. Sorries about the swearings.
Before you read, take note, i'm angry, thats why it turned out so sarcastic. I don't mean it ><
CCB! Trying to be funny with me is it? I tell you i also got limit der hor. You think u got temper i don't have? I'm just bearing with you this cb kia nia. I waste my $o.o5 to hao xin msg u since my fren is free today to help you do ur stuffs. You knn want act cute, mai reply me and is still there playing audition? Fuck you! If i didnt online audition, do i even know you're awake? People ask u tag them you happily tag them. I ask you tag urself to level, then i don't have to pia until so jialat. You ccb say u're tired, rest n relax here and there. You can go long piak(bang wall) liao lah! Keep ask me when completing your thing. CB! Not i don't want help u finish up hor. It's u ownself lazy come pass me. You think you can lazy i cannot? Keep ask me when helping you to level your -Accepttt, keep say what will lose the betting. CCB. Lose then lose lah! You deserve to lose man! Leveling up all by my effort, without me, you need how long to level till your current level46? I think if not for me, you now only 44! I pia until i sibei tired, you still will say help me play, i go smoke, help me play, i talk to fren on phone. You're really a useless piece of shyt! You dont so act cute hor. I'm your gf, not your maid, not your slave. Pm you in audition ask you if you ignored my sms or didnt see it. You still got the cheek to say you're lazy to come down here. You can go die liao lah! I still so naive, thought u're sleeping. Your msn also bo online. Nevermind! You want play? I play with you! CB sia. Simi your character very good. My ass also better than you lah! You think i love you, so you can hiew lan me whenever you like? Need me then talk to me nicely, don't need me then can attitude me. You mai geh siao with me lor. Don't take me for granted you this cb kia. U dun think too highly of yourself hor! Hide in your room when i'm at your house alone in the living room, when i go out then u come out. Say what even if i never go out, you that timing also will come out watch that show. You don't give me cb excuses. Ask you why hiew lan me whole day, you say simi everyday also see each other, nothing to talk liao. FUNNY HUR! Liddat next time marry liao will become strangers? You think i 3 years old kid ar? Wah kan pua angry sia. High blood pressure sia. From low blood straight shoot up till high blood. You can sit down sms other girls, cannot sms me har? I go out without telling you, not a single call from you, not even a single sms. Your sms very expensive is it? Keep to flirt with other girls. Your attitude, no wonder others can't stand you. Say what brother here brother there. You at your brothers back also talk about them. What can't stand his this, can't stand his that. Infront of your brother you also lan lan, treat him very good. Should award you Best Actor Of The Year 2008 har!
Kan angry lah. Mai type ler. He's good to me at times, he's also bad to me at times. I know my post is super sacastic. I will scold him scold until like that is cos i seriously loved him too much, yet i can't sense his love towards me is as much. Such feelings are unbearable. He only knows how to irritate me. At times, he also make me very happy. I don't know what this feeling is. I also dunno whats keeping us together. Maybe its my persistence. If i leave, our relationship will blow. I don't want to leave, i'll try my very best to open up the door between. I really hope he wont make it harder for me to open it up. I'm really scared to lose him. I'm also angry at him. Seriously, i'm at a loss. I know for sure, i wont mention the word breakup to him ever again. For now, just bear with it lor. Hope for a better tomorrow. He use to say ''I'm better than James. When you're with me, you'll only smile. You wont be like how you were when u're with James. I'm not like James, he don't know how to cherish you, but i will. Will you be my gf? I will wait for you no matter how long it takes." Super sweet hur? We used to hug each other to sleep, he used to give me a goodnight kiss before we go to bed. He used to ask me frequently if i'm hungry or not? If i'm bored or not? Want eat what? Want drink water ma? This frequently is not normal frequently okay. Its like every hour ask. It's like nonstop asking der lor. Everytime i go out, it's just a downstairs, 2 blocks away, he'll ask me to take care, anything call him or msg him. After which he'll msg me to say be careful, anything call me again. Each time i go out, first is use mouth, after which is use text. Confirm 2 times to ask me take care, be careful der. Now, he can't even be bothered about my death! Even if i went out all alone at night, he didnt even call, not even a single sms! C omparing the past and now. Such a huge difference lor. haiz. i seriously bo wei gong liao lah. Every time my phone rangs, i would always thought its him. But everytime i see the sender/caller, its not him lah! Kan disappointed T.T
I'm so tired. Past few days at work, kept dozing off! I sneaked inside the storeroom and dozed off there. =p Cannot blame, i'm just too tired. I've slept for less than 5 hours and rushed for work nah. Often, my routine goes like this :
->Slept for 5hours today
->Went for work after i wake
->Had my breakfast on the way to work in bus.
->Took my lunch+dinner break(30mins)
->Carried on working until i went back home.
->Reached home, play maple/audi.
->Went to bed when i feel tired.
->Always got woken up by laogong's game sound(every hour interval thr my sleep)
->Got once got woken up cos he's chatting on the phone with his friend(Female)
->Wake up, feeling very tired.
->Went for work.
->Had breakfast on my way to work.
->...............................
It went on for a few days. Similar routine daily.
When i met heni last night, she said i slimmed down a lil. Went back home to eat supper, brother asked me why i slimmed down. Of cos will slim nar. Even thou i ate alot every day, i still slimmed down. Maybe cos of stress bah. I guess so. I hope my fig will continue to grow smaller. With a slim body, i wont be so troubled when i wear my clothes. I don't have to worry about how i look in those clothes too^^ Oh yes, i forgot to mention this, my boobs seemed to have grown SMALLER compared to last time! I was so shocked when i wore my tube dress. It wasn't as full as last time! When i saw that, i remembered that my colleague mentioned that when u eat very lil to slim down, Ur boobs will become GRAPE from ORANGE[exaggerated version]. My poor boobs =( So sad. They grew smaller. *CRIES* Oh well, it's only my boobs, so forget it!
Life's been tough for me these past 2 weeks. Recently, have been feeling depressed. Cried my hearts out on one of the night. I cried for like an hour. It happened on the 22th. Which was 5 days ago. He went out even thou he saw me crying. I asked him to stay home with me, i don't wish to be alone. Yet, he didnt agree to it, he still went out. Before he went out, i request for a breakup. Yet his reply was "U rest first." and he went out. So i texted him instead, saying i'm serious bout the breakup. Only replied to one of his message. The following are our text&replies.
"I'm serious about the breakup."
"I go find friend talk only then come back liao..B4 7 sure reach home.."
"It's not about u going out or not. It's how u treat me. Ur friend call u, u went out immediately. I ask u go out, u always say see first then end up never go out with me. I feel that i'm not important to u. Ur buddies are of a higher importance than me to u. If u're someone who treats friends better than gf, then i rather be ur friend than ur girlfriend. I feel there's nothing special as ur gf. I would rather be ur friend n be of a higher importance."
"I meet jy n one more friend call lionel i dunno u know him a not.. Sry for leaving u alone at home.. I really love u, u can wait me i b4 7 sure reach home believe me 1 more time.."
"U dun believe u can ask winna i saw her n jms.."
"I also not go meet girl.. Dun worry k i wont do that.."
I only sent him 2 msg in total that night. Cos i was all along crying, my eyes cant see clearly at all. Didnt have the mood to reply him too. I called winna jie while i'm crying to ask her to come accompany me. She heard me crying and she said she's coming over. So she finished up her things over at 768 and came over to accompany me. I was so touched. That night, i drank abit. A lil of his XO+green tea [1/4 XO,1/4green tea]. I drank 1/4 of the whole mixture in one big mouth. I felt giddy after that. I slept not long after winna jie came. He came back at 630am if i never see wrongly. He bought a set of Mcd breakfast for me. SME meal. He woke me up and told me to eat. After which, he started playing his dota and winna jie went off to the living room when he came back. I started eating the hashbrown followed by the burg. I was all along in the living room with winna jie while eating, she was watching the tv then. I was so happy that he remembered that i'm hungry. But he forgot that i don't take cheese. So i had to go over the trouble of removing the cheese from the burg before consuming.
Yesterday, the whole day, i've been experiencing chest pain. At regular intervals of 15mins from i wake till i slept. Estimated chest pains, counting the pains = over 500 times. Its everytime i breath out, it hit me once. Whole day feeling so sick. I went to his house taking the last train cos i suddenly got the urge to play maple&audi. Laughs. Slept at 4am last night and woke at 130am today. LATE FOR WORK! I supposed to reach work place at 1230pm. I reached at 1pm instead. After i opened shop, i went to buy KFC to eat. I took 2hours to finish eating my toasted twisted meal. Oh yes, CB KFC! increase the price of the mayo! It used to be 50cents. Now its double the price. $1. Damm mayo.
Now watching next door guy dancing. He said they've got a performance coming up. Laughs. SO FUNNY! So =='' Laughs laughs~~ Shall stop here. Goodbye!
He cooked last night, late night~ So happy^^ Smiles filled me up. I never once stopped smiling while he's cooking. He made porridge. We watched a movie together, followed by my MissNoGood. He saw that i kept laughing and he started to watch too. Too bored to update the details. Shall post the picture i took of our porridge next time.
Today's the 18th. It happened on the 16th night. He got into A&E @ SGH. I got to know that he went in when i'm closing the shop at Fareast Level 3. I was trying to lock the damm door then. When i first heard about the news, my mind went blank. All i wanted to do then was to get to the hospital as fast as i could, but the door just wont lock. Luckily the girl next door was there to help me. I was so lucky, thank God. I ran to level 1 to return the keys and rushed off for SGH. I reached in 20mins. It was through train okay. It's really fast. Imagine just how fast i ran =x
When i reached SGH, i don't know how to get to A&E, so i asked around. When i finally reached A&E, i don't know how to get to the reception. Damm. So i called jie again to ask her and she lead me there through the phone. I was panicking when i reached the reception okay. Cos i can't find him at A&E, the reception's computer was down too! I looked around and i had a glance of a patient with similar shoes which he usually wears. I rushed up to take a closer look. It was him, lying there covered with a pool of blood. I was stunned. I stood there and my brain paused. I couldnt think at all. Tears flow. I can't check for him condition throught the receptionist, i can't follow him into the operation room either. All i could do is to wait, nothing else. Reject ahfong and james arrived around 11pm. We waited and waited. After a few hours, i went to the recept and asked the nurse again. After she've checked, she confirmed that he's having his hand stitched, so we'll be able to see him soon. I was in a panick and i kept asking the nurse questions. The nurse kept calming me =='' i was so malu then. hahas.
An hour later, the nurse told us he's being bought into the observation ward and we're able to see him. When i first saw him, i kept quiet. I really don't know what to say. It's just too shocking. He took the bag that contains his top and showed us, it's like a bag of blood. I forced my tears from falling, i don't wish to let him see me in tears. We were sent out of the ward by the nurse cos the patients over there needs to rest. I took his cap and that bag out. Awhile later, auntie arrived and went in to see him. Doctor recommended that he stays in the hospital for further observation cos his head is injured, it's best to stay in the hosp. But he's just so stubborn! Rather take the risk than stay in the hosp.
I was so angry then. Why doesnt he want to stay in the hosp??!! Why must he be so stubborn!! He kept rejecting the offer to stay in the hosp even after what the doc says. His mum also gave in to him. Haiz. Let it be. Since it's his wish. The doc recommended a last scan before discharging him to ensure that his brain is alright. I followed him until he went in the x-ray room and waited outside for him. While he's inside doing the scan, i was alone outside the room waiting for him, i snapped and cried. I couldn't control my tears this time round. He came out not long after, i wiped off my tears very quickly and saw him being pushed into another ward, waiting to be discharged. We all waited outside for like an hour before we got to see him walking out, discharged finally! I was so glad to be able to see him walking again. I'm terrified when i saw how much blood he shed while being operated to get his head and hands stitched. Now, i see him walking and kicking alive, with pains thou. But at least, he's kicking lively. Everythings fine and back to normal. We squeezed his mum's van and went back home.
Its past 3am when we reached home, i see that he took his medications before i went to bath. When i came out from my bath, he's sitting outside on the sofa in the living room. I sat there with him, see how weak he looked, my heart broke. He kept asking me to go to sleep. I kept saying i wanted to accompany him. Yet he still shoved me back into the room. I was so depressed that i went back to the room and cried. Why must he push me away? I really needed him so much then. I just wanted to be by his side. I know he's thinking about some things too, but i really just wanted to be by his side. Oh well, nevermind. I just went to bed, cry until i fell asleep.
When i woke up in the morning, i saw him sleeping so i went back home to get my things. I left him a note on the table, asking him to msg me or call me when he wakes. He msged me at around 3pm while i was on the bus on my way back to his house. I called him when i was near his house to ask what he wanna have for lunch. He said he doesnt want to eat, he asked me to eat if i want, he just doesnt want to eat. I was like ...WTF you want lah.. ask u eat lunch, then take medication, u everything also don't want. I hanged the phone and went up his house. It was drizzling then, it explains all the feelings inside me.
When i reached his house, i put my things down and gave him his medications with a cup of water. I sat there quietly, looking at him, hoping that he'll take his medications. He didnt. I sat there for 15mins, can't stand his stubbornesss and went back into the room and ignored him for the day. If u don't want me to stand by you and look after you, i'll let it be. I'll ignore you since u like to be alone so much. Whatever~ I was so tired and i still had to look after you. I even took the day off from my boss to look after you cos i know, ur parents aint at home, nobody's at home to looke after you. I specially took the day off and that's what u gave me in return. Being stubborn, making me worry and stuffs! I hate such things. I left him alone in the living room hoping he'll reflect.
I went to bed after that, crying again. How could he treat me like this! Urgh, take a knife and stab me thank you. Remove me from such pains~ While i was crying, i heard him putting the cup down, the noise. So i tot he had his medications. But why didnt i heard the noise of the medicines's package. In doubt, i went out to ask and he really DID NOT take his medications yet. I saw that his cup is a quarter filled. I took the cup and poured more water for him, placed the cup back onto the table and left for the room. Same thing, i went back onto the bed and cried again. Not long later, i heard the medi's package sound and now, i can confirmed that he's taking his medication ^^ i was so happy that i dashed out to see. He really am holding onto the medicines and i smiled. I sat beside him and helped him with the medicines. He went to cook noodles after he had his medications. Of cos i'm happy~ he's finally willing to take his medications and eat something.
I slept not long after that, am too tired. At around 9+, he came beside me, waking me softly and asked me what i wanna eat for dinner. I wasn't in a state to reply or think, so i ''huh'' his every single question =x In the end, i ''orh'' him. He walked out of the room after putting me back to sleep and told his mum to pack me food. I woke up not long after and went out to watch tv with him. While we're watching tv, he flipped the book which i left a message for him in the morning. He went over and torn the page out, crashed it and threw it away. At that time, i was wondering what he wrote on it that he wanted to throw it away. I even wanted to go downstairs to find that piece of paper to have a look at whats on it. He said he wanted to eat something, but don't know what to eat. So i offered to go down buy since i wanna drink HL choco milk too. He told me what he wanted and i went out. I totally forgot to go get that piece of crashed paper! So i think, nevermind, let it be. It's better not to know anyway.
I've downloaded this taiwan drama series <<不良笑花>> ''Miss No Good'' by Wilber Pan and Raine Yang. We started watching the first episode together. When we're watching, i kept saying ''WOW, look at wilber, handsome right!'' ''Look look! See, SO handsome hor?'' I said similar stuffs for like five to six times. After the 6th time, he stood up and walked out of the room to go back to the living room to watch the damm boring tv - ch 8. Laughs, i know, he's angry and jealous that I said how gorgeous and handsome those actors are. I kept honging him luh~ But he wasnt pleased, so i mai care liao, i go back in to watch my MissNoGood^^ Can't be bothered with such a petty guy =p After which i slept, woke up in the morning.
Seeing that he's still sleeping, i went back to sleep too. When we're both awake, i was so hungry~ His mum packed him rice ler, which he finished up. He didnt even ask me if i'm hungry or not. Alright, its okay. I called my mum and she's at home. So i changed and took my bag to go home. I accompanied him to finish his cigg before i left. Before i left, i asked him "Want me to come back later ma?" "Dunnid bah, u come when u off. Dont travel here and there, too tiring ler.'' "Orh." "When's ur off day?" "Tml after work jiu off ler." "Okay, then u come tml after work." "Orh." "Must come hor." I smiled at that last sentence he said. =x
Reached home, onlined msn, watch tv, eat and stuffs. Around 10+ close to 11pm. Happy msged me, asking me wanna hack or not. Thinked and thinked. OKAY! Hack bah! I shall call him and ask him if i'm able to go over or not. He said okay. I changed and rushed to take the last train (: When i reached the 7-11 near his house, i msged him and ask him if he wanna get anything from 7-11 or not. He said "I'm outside. Wait for me at home." When i saw that msg, i stood at where i was and stared at my phone. People who walked past me, tot i was crazy =='' Seriously, u're injured and u went out at this time to do what! I was so angry that i went in the 7-11, bought my ice-cream and stomped up his house. Super duper angry okay! So i hacked with happy until 3am i think or was it 4am? i forgot. Then i started waiting for him to come back home. When i texted him after i stopped hacking,he said he's coming back soon. So i waited outside in the living room on the sofa for him. I wait until i fell asleep~ ==" When he came back, he woke me up and asked me to go sleep in the room. It was 530am then. So late then come back lor! I asked him why he went out and what he did outside. He said play dota with friends and do some stuffs. Okay lor, nvm, too tired to make noise and i went back to sleep.
Okay, I'm blogging after like, days? Laughs. Seriously, these few days, am really busy working. From Sunday, I've been working till yesterday which is the Friday. Yes! For 6 whole days! And this afternoon around 1pm, my boss texted me, asking if i'm available to work extra for TODAY. If i really went for work which is from 3pm till 10pm. Then, i'll be working 9 days straight! NINE DAYS OKAY! Damm. Today really wanna work der, but i hardly pei laogong mah, so rejected boss's offer T.T I feel lousy after rejecting his offer to work today. If i can work today, i think when i get my pay on 5th Dec, I'll probably get 800SGD which is like, so much~ DUH! But i'm sorry, i'm afraid i cant today. I really got to accompany my laogong. He's of a high importance to me other than money.
When i first received boss's msg, i asked laogong should i go work or not. His reply was "Kan ni lor" Translate = "See you lor" Which is a up to me answer. I knew he would be unhappy if i were to go work. We woke at 3pm today. He climbed up on the bed and looked for me. I was really sleepy then, so i can't be bothered and carry on sleeping. But he was hugging me while i'm asleep, i couldnt really sleep well, so i woked in the end. The first thing i told him after we woke was, let's go grab our lunch. I really wanted to eat TOGETHER with him so much. We hardly meet since i started working. So yea, understand me please. I'm not asking for food the moment i wake like a pig, i'm not a hungry ghost alright! I just wanted to have my lunch with him! But i was so displeased with his reply. ''See how lor" That was his answer to me. Alright alright, fine fine. He started playing his audi after we woke. I was like, whatever~ I went out to the living room and helped him with his things. Half way through his things, i read my CLEO, drink water, walk around the house, go into the room and watch him play. My butt just wont stick to the chair obediently. Laughs. Around 4:30pm, he asked me what i wanna eat, he's going down to pack food. I told him what i wanna eat, and he went off to buy. I was really happy. It was so long since he last asked me what i wanna eat. It's really long (: But abit disappointed. What i wanted at first was to have lunch with him OUTSIDE, not at home. He came back and passed me my food. We ate seperately, i'm in the living room and he had his lunch in his room.
While i was eating, i suddenly got the urge to go toilet and bake something >< so i packed my food back , took the towel and said this " i got bath first, my food i haven't finish, later then eat" Seriously, i talked while i walk to the toilet from his room. My tummy couldnt hold on any further. I really needed the toiletbowl so much. Why did i do so many moves? Why not just rush to the toilet and not say anything? Why came up with the excuse of bathing? Cos i don't like others to know that i'm da bian-ing. It's embarassing~
After i came out from the business i had in the toilet plus showering, i went on to do his things. That was around 530pm. At around 6pm, he came out from his room and started helping me to complete his thing. Last night before going out, we were doing that thing of his, together (: I was really happy at that point of time. We chatted so much. Smiles, laughters and happiness were all on my face. His face had those too. But there were doubts too, i just didnt pour them out. I don't wish to have any arguements not long after we got back together. Yupp.
I asked him these "What if got people hong me?" "What if i talk on phone with other guys?" "What if i message with other guys?" "Got people say my voice cute leh." "Got people wanna date me." "At work got people take number from me lor." There're many many WHAT-IF questions. His replies were mainly "Don't let me find them, they sure end up in hospital." He overheard my conversation with my audi couple before he went out, so he questioned me also lah. He asked who my couple whack last night. I said "A guy lor." and guess what he said, he said this "ask him come whack me lah, I'll make sure he become a xiao di di" Okay, whatever, obviously he's not shuang that i talked to my couple on phone. Laughs~ I told him not to touch any of these guys i've talked or texted or whatever. I don't wish to see them on the hospital bed.
He showed me four photos of a new guy which he wanna whack last night. This guy looks GREAT! Definitely someone i would wanna meet. He looks abit like RAIN BI~! I was like stunned when i first saw the photos. Really KAWAII leh! So i told my boyfriend "You can whack anywhere of this guy, ONLY his face CANNOT touch!" I even said, "Bring me go when u all going down to whack him leh, i want see this guy real life." Obviously he said, NO to every single please-bring-me-go questions i gave him. Just now, we talked about this guy again. Of cos, i asked him to bring me along AGAIN. His answers were a NO-NO. Hurhur, whatever, this guy's face is pictured in my brain, i can go down his area and take a look myself (: Laogong wanna find out this guy's address, which is kindda hard to find cos low-profile maintained by this guy. Only way is to find out the address from the guy himself. So i offered, "Why not i go close to him and find out his address?" His immediate reply was "Then he wont end up in the hospital ler." I was so happy when he said that, at least this guy will be safe mah! I was self-happying inside. But this washed away my inner laughter "he'll end up in the coffin instead." I was like ....what the hell..... luh~ Laughs.
Laogong went out in a rush just now, ah fong tio taiji. Now i'm waiting in vain at home for his return T.T Sadded. Since 11+ he went out, till now, he's still not back. I'm worried. I wanna call him der, but i'm afraid that i'll disturb him. So i dropped the idea of calling him. His mum also asked me for his news, but i've got nothing to report to her. ): How i wish he could just tell me how's the situation over at that side. Reject was being called down too. I hope things would be find for these guys. *Prays*
19:40"Eaten your dinner? I miss you a lot lor. How do u think about our relationship so far?"
20:02"Ya.. Eaten my dinner.."
20:17"Is there something wrong with us? ==? Did i make u angry in anyway?"
21:20"My thing euu do ler ma?"
21:28"Nope, I no time go up do. I see later how. The sewing, very easy de. A few hrs done. Wed i off, i on wed pass u."
21:30"I tot euu that day come up my hse wan pass mi der.. My training started on thur.."
21:38"U already training or starting ur training on thur?"
21:50"Already started.."
22:07"Sorries. I really too tired aft work to do it last week. Ten we still cold war, i no mood do.I tml n tue got work. I wed night pass u.Tue night i going over do after work."
22:20"kk.."
Ask him about us, he came with a reply of his things. Really nothing to say. Don't know what to do either. Sighs.
Stayed over at dear's house last night. Actually didnt have the intention of staying over, as i couldn't catch the last bus back home, i stayed. We didnt even chat since i stepped into his house, till this afternoon i left his house. Came in without a word, left without a word too. Not even a hello, not even a bye. He did talked to me last night. Go inside the room and sleep. These six words. That's all. He came out of the room and asked me to go into the room and sleep. Around 2am i think. Was semi-coma when i heard those words. Twice i think, first time is to wake me up and ask me to go into his room and sleep. I sat up, was too tired and blur to even walk, i stared into the blank and look around, trying to figure out where i am. That's funny when i think back. Laughs. After a shortwhile, he saw that i didnt go in, he came out and asked me to go in again, then and only then, i stood up and understand what i should do. That is to walk into his room, climb onto his bed, and sleep. He make sure that i stood up, then he came over to off the fan in the living room and started walking back to his room. So i blur blur, follow him back to his room, walked behind him. Upon reaching the room, he helped me to switch on the fan in his room and he sat down back to face is comp. So eventually,i slept. While sleeping, B texted me. I press away the message and continue to sleep. Sorry but i was too tired and unconcious to look at any words.
I woke up at around 11am. I heard him talking quite loudly on the phone, then i woke up. He kept talking to the other party about soccer and bettings. It was so noisy that i woke up. Cant sleep well. Imma light sleeper, so can't blame me for waking up at a pin-drop sound. Laughs. Woke up, removed my make up, oops, i didnt remove my makeup last night cos i dozed off. Brush my teeth, pack my stuffs, take my bag, and left without a word. He didnt bother keeping me back either. So let it be. I open the door myself, i close the door myself too. I really don't know, are we working? Or we've stopped. He couldnt give me any answer, i don't wish to bother him with any questions. Its just in case that he says i'm nagging him, which even his mum also don't dare. So i rather not take up the job on questioning. Let him come forward and clarify things. I'll leave it as it is for now. Until then, i wont make any move, i wont msg him or call him unless necessary. People ask me, you and him still together? I really don't know what to answer. My replies are always "yes, still together >> sort of still together >> think so stilll together >> i don't know lah" liddat. My answers, always these 4, one after another i tell them. so at the end of the day, they also dunno we still together or not. Laughs. Me myself don't know either, how would they know? My mum asked too. i gave her the same answers, and her expressions were. shakehead and plus a [haiz] . speechless i guess.
It'll be a long day tml also. At far east level 3, a boring no-sales ulu small lil shop. hate that place alot. boring. wonder what imma gonna do to pass time tomorrow =( Watched CyborgGirl. Now watching I'mACyborgButThat'sOkay . Later gonna watch 恋空. Goodbye, Going back to my movie~
urgh, gona be late for work! ><><>< byebye!!!!!!!!!
Lastly, when will he msg me today with the ''^^'' On wednesday night, i msged him this >> Are you gonna ignore me for good? << His reply was "^^". The next day which is yesterday, thursday, he msged me at around 6pm "^^". What he trying to say lor. U know, xiao li chang dao, A knife hidden behind a smile. laughs. bye! Gonna rush!
Woke at 7.45 this morning. Guess what time i slept last night? Hehe, i slept at 2am. So total hours of sleep i've gotten equals to almost 6hours. This 6hours is just half of my usual sleeping time! I'm deprived of sleep alright! What was i doing between 12am till 2am? Hacking the UBP in audition. Laughs. mere 2hours, i've made 3millions dens. It goes like this >> 3,000,000 << . Chio right?! =p Luckily got 2 people pei wo UBP, both hackers too! We're not pro in hacking but since there're 3 people hacking together, we made it through successfully, without any failures. Was so happy after looking at my dens. It was like waterfall!
Got to save up 150million dens for my FAM in audition T.T Hard time sia. Wonder when can i finish saving up. guess i would need a few resets i think. Gahs >.<'' Having another session of hacking later on, after i've waked up from my nap. Should be around 5am as agreed, but when i went in audition just now, there's a network maintenance until 6am. So i guess we'll have to do it at 6am instead.
Gotta rush for work tomorrow. I was scheduled from 4pm till 10pm, but boss went to extend my schedule. He asked me to reach at 1pm and i'll have to work all the way until 11pm! Why? Metro sales lor! 20% storewide, its the christmas sales lah. No choice, slogger myself till 11pm bah. Work hard girl ! You've nothing else except work left. Everyone left you, only work didnt. So glad that there's work with me. If not right now, i'll probably be crying on my bed with my blanket over my whole body and having a hard time breathing. I'm lucky.
Alot of things happened for the past few days. I'll do a rewind (: O5.11.O8, Wed - Accompanied dear to find uncle to help him solve his current mystery, that "thing" and his half-paralysed face since lunar 7th month. He got some amulet and was told to follow some instructions. He can finally sleep in his room , get to use his fan and he's able to off the lights to sleep. =x O5.11.O8, wed - Quarrelled with him. I was merely being concern about the instructions that was given to him. So i msged him, asking him, has he bath? He was supposed to burn the amulet and put it in the bathing water and bath. His reply was "Ya, nw eating.." He was also supposed to do another thing, which is to burn the yellow amulet, put in water, and drink it up. So i msged him " You got burn the yellow amulet and drink ma?" Bloody hell, his reply "I know wad to do lah.. Even my mum also dun dare nag me" WTH. I was just afraid that you'll forget to do anything ma. All these things are important to the recovery of your bloody half paralyzed face okay! You think i eat full full then nothing do then go waste my every 5 cents to msg you? You think again. If i'm nagging you, i wont msg u only at 3pm+ I would have done that at 1pm instead! Its so DUH, YOU KNOW HOW ANGRY I AM lah. Of cos, i was so angry that i typed "I'm just asking right? U dun have to attitude me. Since u dun like me to ask den sua. From now on dun talk to me lor." After which, he didnt reply, i also didnt bother to text him anything. O5.11.O8, wed - Until at night, he texted me" Euu coming later or" . After reading his msg, i wanted to reply " U want me come or not?" But think again, if i msg him that, his reply confirm will be ''Up to you" So sua, i replied this instead >> What. Why still talk to me.<< >>>Then its ok..<< Chio girl! Way to go! Show him that u've got temper too! Show him that u're a human, not a pet who obeys the master! Make him appreciate you! Make him treasure you! O4.11.O8, Tue - Got back to his house after work. Ate half plate of the rojak his mum gave me. He came out from a shower not long later. Then he was telling me about the new hack and he learned the glitch from Ying. When did he learned it? A few days ago, but he denied to me last time. Meaning? he lied lor. So i asked him to teach me the glitch. He showed me and guided me. After we're done, he said this. Shouldn't have taught you, cos ying said so. She say you will leak out for sure. I was told not to teach u der, and next time, cannot tell u alot of things ler. I got my reason der.......... So i kept asking why why why why & why. He finally said, cos u will leak out. His alot of things applies even to his personal life, in simple, any thing. Yes, >>> Any Thing <<<>auntie, i go home first ler. Byebye ^^< Her face was full of question mark cos she was wondering what happened to me and eugene as she heard eugene raised his voice.
Thats all i've got to update. Super tired. Actually that's not all. Just too tired to type further. Had enough of the think-back stufffs. Time to hop on to bed, got to wake at 6am later on. Or maybe not. depends on the both of them. Alright. Goodnight. Bye (:
I know i shouldnt be typing these words. I'm a super civilised person. But i'm sorry this time round i really can't help it. Just let me vent my anger until i'm pleased. Thanks and just bear with it for the time being. Sorries about the swearings.
Before you read, take note, i'm angry, thats why it turned out so sarcastic. I don't mean it ><
CCB! Trying to be funny with me is it? I tell you i also got limit der hor. You think u got temper i don't have? I'm just bearing with you this cb kia nia. I waste my $o.o5 to hao xin msg u since my fren is free today to help you do ur stuffs. You knn want act cute, mai reply me and is still there playing audition? Fuck you! If i didnt online audition, do i even know you're awake? People ask u tag them you happily tag them. I ask you tag urself to level, then i don't have to pia until so jialat. You ccb say u're tired, rest n relax here and there. You can go long piak(bang wall) liao lah! Keep ask me when completing your thing. CB! Not i don't want help u finish up hor. It's u ownself lazy come pass me. You think you can lazy i cannot? Keep ask me when helping you to level your -Accepttt, keep say what will lose the betting. CCB. Lose then lose lah! You deserve to lose man! Leveling up all by my effort, without me, you need how long to level till your current level46? I think if not for me, you now only 44! I pia until i sibei tired, you still will say help me play, i go smoke, help me play, i talk to fren on phone. You're really a useless piece of shyt! You dont so act cute hor. I'm your gf, not your maid, not your slave. Pm you in audition ask you if you ignored my sms or didnt see it. You still got the cheek to say you're lazy to come down here. You can go die liao lah! I still so naive, thought u're sleeping. Your msn also bo online. Nevermind! You want play? I play with you! CB sia. Simi your character very good. My ass also better than you lah! You think i love you, so you can hiew lan me whenever you like? Need me then talk to me nicely, don't need me then can attitude me. You mai geh siao with me lor. Don't take me for granted you this cb kia. U dun think too highly of yourself hor! Hide in your room when i'm at your house alone in the living room, when i go out then u come out. Say what even if i never go out, you that timing also will come out watch that show. You don't give me cb excuses. Ask you why hiew lan me whole day, you say simi everyday also see each other, nothing to talk liao. FUNNY HUR! Liddat next time marry liao will become strangers? You think i 3 years old kid ar? Wah kan pua angry sia. High blood pressure sia. From low blood straight shoot up till high blood. You can sit down sms other girls, cannot sms me har? I go out without telling you, not a single call from you, not even a single sms. Your sms very expensive is it? Keep to flirt with other girls. Your attitude, no wonder others can't stand you. Say what brother here brother there. You at your brothers back also talk about them. What can't stand his this, can't stand his that. Infront of your brother you also lan lan, treat him very good. Should award you Best Actor Of The Year 2008 har!
Kan angry lah. Mai type ler. He's good to me at times, he's also bad to me at times. I know my post is super sacastic. I will scold him scold until like that is cos i seriously loved him too much, yet i can't sense his love towards me is as much. Such feelings are unbearable. He only knows how to irritate me. At times, he also make me very happy. I don't know what this feeling is. I also dunno whats keeping us together. Maybe its my persistence. If i leave, our relationship will blow. I don't want to leave, i'll try my very best to open up the door between. I really hope he wont make it harder for me to open it up. I'm really scared to lose him. I'm also angry at him. Seriously, i'm at a loss. I know for sure, i wont mention the word breakup to him ever again. For now, just bear with it lor. Hope for a better tomorrow. He use to say ''I'm better than James. When you're with me, you'll only smile. You wont be like how you were when u're with James. I'm not like James, he don't know how to cherish you, but i will. Will you be my gf? I will wait for you no matter how long it takes." Super sweet hur? We used to hug each other to sleep, he used to give me a goodnight kiss before we go to bed. He used to ask me frequently if i'm hungry or not? If i'm bored or not? Want eat what? Want drink water ma? This frequently is not normal frequently okay. Its like every hour ask. It's like nonstop asking der lor. Everytime i go out, it's just a downstairs, 2 blocks away, he'll ask me to take care, anything call him or msg him. After which he'll msg me to say be careful, anything call me again. Each time i go out, first is use mouth, after which is use text. Confirm 2 times to ask me take care, be careful der. Now, he can't even be bothered about my death! Even if i went out all alone at night, he didnt even call, not even a single sms! C omparing the past and now. Such a huge difference lor. haiz. i seriously bo wei gong liao lah. Every time my phone rangs, i would always thought its him. But everytime i see the sender/caller, its not him lah! Kan disappointed T.T
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JiaHuan