F[O]REVER, I [W]ILL B[E] A STRONG [G]IRL

but how do i do it.

Friday, June 27, 2008

seeing those with with SLIM bodies, fitting their bodies with pretty warm cuddling dresses. FULL OF ENVY TOTALLY! ABSOLUTELY! DEFINITELY! i'm tired of being fat actually. hate my body ):

i know. there are people fatter than me. BUT. i'm still not happy with my body's size. u see. there are alot of people who has got this FAIR, THIN, SHORT and PERFECT BODY. AND THEY are PRETTY. why can't i be like them. someone told me this before: '' as long as u're slim, your looks don't really matter.'' thats quite true. saw one girl one day, she doesn't look pretty. but becos of her slim and nice body. she looks pretty. cos of what she wear. her bf looks handsome also ok.

so pissed. why do i have to suffer with this BIG FAT BODY OF MINE! TAO YAN LA. i don't say those vulgarities. so nth will come out of my mouth . nor thr my hands. :D but i'm really angry
>:(

i want wear the dress without any flabs. i wanna be skinny. wear everything also nice, dun have to be worried of the heels breaking while wearing. fit into almost everything i like and see. so nice. sometimes go blogshops, see the clothes they put on their blogs to sell, how i wish i could just SQUEEZE IN and look nice also ):

any methods to slim down? how i wish got a type of pill, u eat down, will slim 1kg down when u wake the next morning. then i'll eat 1 pill every night for 10 consective nights. then i'll BE VERY SLIM LE ^^

TOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BADDDD ! no such pills available. HATE IT LA. i'll stop venting about this stupid slim down topic. i'll get back to my ABSOLUTE BOYFRIEND! JYAA NA!!

2.18am.

1:24 AM | back to top

floodings throughout the world.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

what's wrong with the climate? India had their monsoon earlier than EXPECTED. how early was it? it was TWO weeks earlier. that's seriously early. killing and dispatching people, destroying homes and our PRECIOUS RICE - the staple food of Asians.

NOT only India had their EARLY monsoon. China's Yellow River, which was drying out throughout the recent decades, MAY encounter a large flood SOON as the heavy rain may swell this 5,500km river. the heavy rain has already caused the Xijiang river ,in Guangxi, to hit a 20-year high water level - surpassing 6.8m ! i'm only 1.6m ok. and i can't even swim. I'M GLAD THAT I'M NOT IN GUANGXI RIGHT NOW. if not, i'll be in heaven meeting God now. ^^ so this China is really so suay ok. not long after earthquake, comes the floodings. i wonder what comes after this. ><

so after India and China, let's head to the US ! hear this, even US got the floodings~

what happened in US? it happened at Iowa - the US's top corn-producing state. the flooding not only took place at Iowa. also at some parts of the Midwest. these corns are newly-planted corn. OMG. corn babies. SO CUTE! it actually looks more like a padi field now. i can only see WATER from the picture, it looks like part of the sea. its light blue still. haha. shall not laugh at it first. the farmers are actually very suay due to the the climate. quoted from the papers " Since the beginning of this month, first tornadoes and then heavy rain and flooding....." so, its a total suay-ness ): not only those baby corns which are affected. the tiny soya beans are also affected ok, some other minor plantations too. not stated in the papers, but i know u know, u know i know, those plantations, its enough already.

why am i concerned?
1. fuel prices are hiking - one source of fuel is the bio-fuel. in another word, its through the corns or any other source of plants/animals. what was affected in these floods? the CORNS and SOYA BEANS. which means, food price will rise within few week. hopefully not luh.
2. food prices are rising - the rice crops at india was affected by the floods. the corns and soya beans at US. and i think, the quakes at Japan happened around those RICE FIELDS and agricultural fields. so, its MONEY matter again la. so sick of the money.

but don't worry, since i'm in singapore, i wont be affected to a HUGE extend. why? cos SG's Dollar is STILL strong enough to help us maintain the purchasing power. woooooo. cheers to the sg dollar hur !

Let's just pray that, God would help the world overcome this crisis, lessen the natural disasters that's happening around the world. OFF TO MY BOOKS !

10.28AM

9:56 AM | back to top

The Newspaper

Monday, June 16, 2008

i started to enjoy reading the newspaper alot this week. why?
1. it helps to kill my time fast. - it was really fast. i started reading at 1030am. when i saw my mum woke up, it was already 12+ noon already ! isn't it fast ! kills my boredom.
2. it helps me to know the world more. know whats happening around the world other than singapore this small little dot in the world map. - thats what a newspaper is for.
3. interesting happenings will catch me. :D not i catch it.
4. it doesn't only contain world news. it has a section LIFE which is mainly for entertainment media. celebs, singers, and the entertainment world's events. cool. u get to know whats with these celebs. - who don't know about this? i'm just crapping anyway (:
5. it's really cool :p

seriously, if u haven been reading the newspaper recently or for the past i-don't-know-how-many-years. PLEASE. get a copy of The Straits Times TOMORROW and start reading during your free time. even if its just a few articles of it, u'll still think, it's worth it. i don't expect myself to read every single tinie winie article. i just read it out of leisure. on the back-to-newspaper day, guess how many articles i read out of the whole newspaper? i tell u, its JUST, mind this, its J-U-S-T, a mere 4 articles. and these articles are SHORT okay. but i still find it interesting. cos' i know somethings through the papers :D

NOW remind yourself to get one copy of The Straits Times TOMORROW and read it ! it's just 80cents anyway.
read 8 article, its 10 cents each article. not bad. cheap ma.
read 80 articles, its 1 cent per article. GOOD!. even cheaper !
read more than 80articles? it's less than 1 cent per article okay ! there's nothing cheaper than that !

i shall post what interesting happenings i came across in the papers TOMORROW (:

GRAB YOUR OWN "The Straits Times" TOMORROW !

time now : 9:34PM

9:17 PM | back to top

i'm both happy , and sad . i don't know why either.

Friday, June 13, 2008

as what the title says . i'm both happy . and sad . seriously . its a mixture. think of this = happy . think of that = sad . so together = mix mix lah ! seriously don't know . let me tell u the stories.

sad case:
officially , she left me. she made up her mind to leave me this time. and she meant it. i always don't treat her as a treasure since we broke up. could be cos' i know she's always there for me. so i don't have to worry about anything. but i'm wrong. this time round, she wont be there for me anymore. no longer there. okay. tears drop down my face when i wrote this. i regret scolding her when i woke up. i know i shouldn't scold her. i don't know why. maybe, God made me do that. to let her be determined to leave me. yeah. to leave me. i'm missing her now. tears couldn't stop flowing down. even thou i wanted to stop her from leaving. something kept coming into my mind. and that's [ she can finally lead a good life, don't ruin her good future ] . it kept popping up, non-stop. so i dropped the idea of asking her to stay. finally she's willing to leave. i shouldn't ask her to stay. i always see her suffer with me. but, i just wanted her to be by my side badly. so i can't control myself for selfishly keeping her here. i can't control also. hated myself for stopping her from getting her happiness. hated myself for not being able to give her the happiness n company she needed always. i wanted to accompany her, forever, till her death, as wadever i can be beside her. but, i don't know why. i can't keep myself to just her. i just can't put my full attention on her after the 1year r/s. i'm worried when she's sick. i'm worried when she's sad. i'm empty when i couldn't see her. after we broke up, it's still the same. but just that. alot more people came into my life after that incident happened to me. the person who's there for me most. was her. it was cos' of her, that made me come out of that incident. i was glad i had her. cos' she's always there, i took her for granted. i didn't treasure her. after she finish working, she still buy food for me. she really gave her everything for me. yet i didn't treasure her. not cos i don't want to treasure her. Just that, i don't know why also lah. u're not me. u will never know how it felt. i felt bad. now i'm in msn with her. i don't know how to talk to her. i'll jsut pretend. that i'm fine (: why. why was it me. why can't i learn to treasure people. like how others do. its something to be learned? i tried. tried for one whole year. was it cos i didn't put in enough effort. or was it cos she's a girl. or was it cos she. aiya. suan le ba. i'll just stop bothering. the only thing which i didn't want to do. was done by her. she broke up our audition couple. ask me how sad i am now. i'll name everything to u man! i wanted to stop talking about all these. cos its embarassing to be crying in mac okay. thanks yongsheng for helping me take the tissues :DD

happy case.
in the evening, i was tired, it was time for his dinner. so we say. break time. then i said i'll go rest awhile. before going offline, i asked him for his schedules tomorrow. he wakes at 7am (6am sg time) . than i asked him today what time offline. he checked his dictionary to figure out what i'm trying to say. then after a long while, he finally replied. 1am bed. meaning: 1am, he'll offline to go to bed. so i said okay. then when i was about to go off. he ask. ''nana tonight online?'' awwww so cute. i said yes. then we did the same faces [ ^^ ] . then offline :D i went to sleep. and woke up late. wanted to wake at 8pm to go home, bath, online audi. but turn out. 10pm wake. reach home 1030pm. it's almost 11pm after bathing. so i onlined audi. he's not inside. sad. went to msn instead. chat with mummy. we started chatting about daddy n zex. we said how happy we are and blah blah blah. of cos. there're sad things. and ALOT. when mummy afk. i decided to go in audi. dunno why. just went in. opened audi messenger. AND POOF! i saw him online. i was so happy! then i ZEX! him of cos. haha? lame la. if only i can apply this to her. how bliss i would have been right. shall not broooooo over it! then we chatted. he told me he drinked a little alchohol, so that he could get to slp . cos he can't sleep. i wonder why. haha. weather too hot? haha! then he asked me, whats [ <3 ] . then , and only then , i knew that he doesn't know what that means! gosh ! his brains abit straight? haha! then i told him <3 = love? haha. then he ''oh..'' i was surprised he doesnt know what that is okay. then after which, we went for our first and last game =.= combination ya. we went for club dance. haha. after that. we said those goodbye stuffs. goodnight stuffs. ending, i put <3 and guess what. he replied with a <3~ awww. thats sweet. and i know, thats what she will do also. whenever i remind myself of her, tears would flow out. so auto. God gave me tears to help me to be able to bear with everything in this world. so this is how it comes in handy. i love my tears. cures my sorrows. bit by bit. until i've got no more tears to drop, i'll sleep. i'll miss her alot. thou zex would be there, thou everyone will be there also. i'll miss her badly. even now. i'm chatting with her abit by abit in msn. but i'm missing her. sian-ness. don't know what to do now. no mood study, no mood audi. think i'll just listen to this Gotta Get You.

i'll miss the times. from the 1st day. to the 365 day. and the days after the 365 days. till today. even till the future. anywhere. till i'm dead. shall go home now. dunno what to type any longer neither. the story ends here. and i shall post what nicholas told me about NS stuff. lame NS . made me laugh non-stop.

i stopped this article at 7.39am.

6:30 AM | back to top